Contrary to popular belief...

I am not:

• a hipster
• Korean
• someone who cheats on his girlfriend
• a germaphobe

But I:

• Enjoy watching/playing sports, buying my coffee from Starbucks and eat red meat like it's going out of style, despite having been known to spend 20 minutes fixing my hair with an array of product so that it looks like I just got out of bed and didn't spend any time on it at all, while wearing a vintage T underneath a sports coats, my Pumas and a Texas beltbuckle, so that when I'm pretending to listen to you babble on I'm actually sending out a Sex, Drugs and Cocoa Puffs come hither vibe to that skinny blond girl with a tongue ring smoking her Parliment.
  
• Am Chinese by ethnicity, American by citizenry (granted we do all look the same)
• Have the capacity to fall head over heels in love with people at inopportune times despite what social norms deem appropriate
  
• Will share drinks with those I deem "clean"

Hope that clears things up, have a good day.